It's surprising to come across this wonderful club. Thank you for your sharing. I've been learning English by myself for almost two years. I would like to talk about this topic!

I think wanting to become a better version of myself is a healthy desire of me. That desire came up since I was a little girl. It drove me to behave better and focused on my study. That's why I got good marks at school. This desire filled my life all the time. It just like a regulator—always reminds me of improving myself and  to learn something. But every coin have two sides. This desire also makes me feel stressed and anxious when I get  stuck or run out of energy. During that period of time, my mind told me I need to do something, but my body didn't want to. That was suffering. I think desires are mostly learned from society, so is mine. Society full of competition. If you want to live a better life, you need to get rich, to be strong, be smarter or handle some special skills.